As many of you fellow “Baconistas” know, I’ve had the awesome opportunities to do some extensive traveling all throughout the Pacific Northwest this year on some very official www.baconFreak.com “Bacon Business!” While there I got a chance to meet some really cool people and visit with some old friends.
I especially spent a lot of time visiting the tourist sites and hanging out with various “Bacon Buddies” seemingly strewn randomly between Portland and Seattle. This year a lot was going on in Washington, so I had a chance to hang out with my writer buddy Larry and do everything from fishing the Lewis River winding down from placid Lake Merwin to hiking through the wild and wondrous wilderness trails leading right up to foot of restless Mount St. Helens.
Larry’s a good guy; sharp as a tack and we’ve been friends for years, as he used to live down in SoCal before escaping up to his magical mountain manor. Being a professional writer, he’s got quite a creative mind and being a “people person” he spends a lot of his off time hanging on with the locals.
So I wasn’t all that surprised to discover that he’s already gotten pretty well, completely “De-Californicated” and I think maybe his vivid imagination has been spending a little bit too much time alone up on those mountain peaks and forging through the forests, because he and a few other friends of mine had some strange tales to tell.
You see, the indigenous natives throughout the region have always told stories of surprise visitations and sightings of what they call “Sasquatch and what we normally simply refer to as “Big Foot!” Well, even though the jury is still out on whether Sasquatch ever did exist, let alone still exists, people in that region, even to this day continue to share stories about personal “run ins” with “Big Foot.”
Now Larry is no kook by any means and while he has a writer’s vivid imagination, he’s a pretty solid and sound, rational thinker with his head on straight and his heart in the right place. So I was a little surprised to hear him defend some of the locals who keep talking about such nonsense as if it’s truly REAL!
What is this obsession with Sasquatch and why won’t people just “Let It Go! I just don’t get it. Now, according to a few of Larry’s local friends, there have been sightings and encounters with a few small parties of poachers driving around the mountain road and through the forests with SUV’s with Texas license plates, dressed up like vigil ante snipers, with all the camouflage gear and sniper rifles.
Seems a few of these good ole’ boys started chatting up some of the locals after a few whiskey shots and beer chasers, and they claim their looking for Sasquatch, but then they immediately laughed it off as if it’s a joke. So now no one knows what to believe. Are they joking, or are they actually trying to capture or maybe even kill themselves a real Sasquatch? No one knows.
Now we have all these tree hugging crazies writing to the local government officials, seeking some sort of official political sanctuary for a mythological creature that no one has been able to prove exists for over 100 years.
I think it’s just plain crazy, but Larry’s already taken kindly to the locals and so he just smiles and says Welcome To The Pacific Northwest Rocco, Please check your doubts and judgments at the border Sir! Maybe he’s right, they do eat an awful lot of bacon and Bacon Jerky up in “them thar hills,” so maybe I’m barking up the wrong tree.
Something tells me this isn’t the last I’m going to here about Big Foot. I guess maybe he’s over, hanging out with The Tooth Fairy, Casper The Friendly Ghost Writer and The Loch Ness Monster. Anyway, it’s a beautiful area and if you’ve never been, check it out on your next vacation, you’ll be glad you did!
Just watch be sure to watch out for the big, strong hairy guy swinging through the trees up there! Oh, never mind … that’s just Larry. “Hey, get a haircut you dang hippy!”
Signing Off and Pigging Out,
Rocco “Boss Hog” Loosbrock
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